10 Simple Steps Toward Keeping Stress at Bay

As you all know, the last several months have been filled with some major life changes. Brit's new job, my agency closing, moving to a new state, getting ready to bring another human being into the world. I mean, who the heck piles all of these events into 6 months?? 

Apparently, we do. Major life events can be incredibly stressful. However, day to day life can also be incredibly stressful. So today I wanted to share some words from the wise {my mother} on stress. 

Just for a little background as to why I think she is a worthy advocate for how to handle stress, my mother has 4 children. The oldest is 8 years older than the youngest. For some of you, you may be saying "ok, stop there, enough said". For those of you who are breeders, she also worked as a nurse while we were growing up, and went to school, getting her masters. Now she teaches in the health department at Miami University. She definitely had support from my father, but he was a college basketball coach so he was traveling a lot and had practice or games late in the evening... 

{all four of us on Christmas. Matthew, the brother on the far right, got her June for Christmas. That was the month she would be finished with school.}

Ok, that's enough. She was a busy woman with a lot of things to stress her out. I'm sure we can all relate to some, if not all, of the stressors listed. And maybe you have even more {may God bless you}. She was asked to give a presentation at a women's conference on stress, so I thought I'd share it with all of you as well. 

I've come up with 10 simple steps toward keeping stress at bay. Think of them as 10 gifts to yourself. These 10 steps will take some practice, but the payoff will be well worth it. 

1. Triage your Day
We are often overwhelmed by the tasks and responsibilities of each day. So much so, that our thinking is clouded. 
- Prioritize: Make a list to determine what must get done today and what can wait. Put today's tasks in order of importance and address each one based on this. 
- Organize: It is highly stressful not to be able to find what you're looking for: your car keys, your other shoe, the stuffed animal that your child relies on to go to sleep, etc. Have a system in place so you have what you need ahead of time or you know right where to find it. 
- Eliminate: Throw out unneeded papers and other unnecessary clutter. When a task is completed, scratch it off your list for a feeling of accomplishment and satisfaction. 

2. Exercise
Not only does exercise help keep your body healthy, it can stimulate growth of new brain cells. It can reduce stress as well. A recent study found that taking a brisk walk can reduce anxiety as well as blood pressure. Even a 10 minute walk leaves you feeling more energetic and relaxed for up to 2 hours. People who are regular exercisers feel more in control and have a milder physical stress response before, during, and after exposure to stress. A brisk 45 minute walk, 3 times per week for 3 months can improve how you perceive daily hassles and increase overall well-being. 

These facts make sense when you remember how your body's stress response prepares you for physical emergencies. If you don't exert yourself, you have these energy sources in reserve you are not utilizing and your energy cycle is not complete. Physical activity allows your body to use up that "nervous energy" that can keep you awake or feeling frustrated. Find ways to simply be more active. Exercise routines for some people can create more stress, but activity can be worked in any time. 

3. Nourish Your Body
Eating well increases the energy bank your body needs to draw from when you are stressed. Plenty of whole grains, fruits, vegetables, and water supply your body and brain with the kind of energy it desires. Being well nourished also improves your self-esteem and feelings of "self-control". Foods high in excess fat and sugar or those that are highly processed and "imitation" can sap your energy levels and make you feel sluggish and heavy. Water carries oxygen to the muscles, also creating more energy, while too much caffeine can lead to over-stimulation, agitation, and sleeplessness. 

4. Get Rid of Guilt

You cannot do it all, and no one expects you to. If you are like most women and have to multi-task many different roles, determine which 2 are the most important. Focus your efforts on those two. I love a clean, organized house. But if you come to my house, you will see that I will always choose one of my kids' sporting or school events over cleaning. I may get a C- in housekeeping, but I hope I have an A+ in parenting. {she does}. 

{via}

Many working mothers are all too familiar with the little face pressed against the window as she backs down the driveway to go to work. Guilty for going to work, guilty for staying home. Guilt leads to resentment, and resentment leads to stress. We have to learn to set limits on what we will and will not do, and stick within these limits without apology. Learn to say no, but don't criticize the work of those who said yes. Say no, and let it go. 




5. Inner Identity
We wear many hats that change frequently within the course of a day. An important part of managing stress is knowing your identity apart from your role in your career, as a parent, spouse, sister, daughter, friend, etc. If you are pulled in many different directions, you will lose sight of your own needs, and that will decrease your ability to deal with stress. Take some time to yourself to reflect on who you really are -- what make you unique. 

6. Flexibility
There are situations when even your best efforts to be organized, manage your time, and take care of yourself can't help you avoid life's unforeseen events. For example, 3 of my 4 children had chicken pox within 1 week of each other. My husband was out of town, and I was working and going to school. In situations like this, you look at what you can and cannot control and work around it -- without guilt! A rigid inflexible schedule is a guaranteed stress-producer. So many people move through their days like robots -- slaves to their schedules. A 10 minute walks or day dream can allow you to feel more refreshed and productive. 

7. Treat Yourself

While you are making a to-do list, be sure your own needs are listed as well. We are care-takers as women. But we cannot take care of others very well if we don't take care of ourselves. Allow some down-time, either after work or early in the morning before the house is awake. Destress with a cup of something, a long bath, a leisurely walk, a short nap. Meditation, prayer, or even just being silent for 10-20 minutes has been found to reduce the stress response as well as blood pressure. Treating yourself is not selfish -- it's self-preserving. 

8. Sleep
Lack of sleep is both a cause and an effect of too much stress. Without sleep our mental and physical capabilities gradually deteriorate. We get irritable, forgetful, headaches, and are more susceptible to weight gain. Stage 4 sleep {the good, deep kind} produces the neurotransmitter serotonin, which creates a satisfied, calm feeling and can reduce cravings. Studies indicate that despite what 'they' may say, most adults need between 7-9 hours of quality sleep every night to function adequately. You can't make up for lack of sleep though the week on the weekend. A regular schedule is needed. 

9. Silliness
Don't lose your sense of humor. Laughter truly is the best medicine. A few minutes of belly laughing can invigorate you as much as brisk exercise, and for many people it's a lot more fun! When you laugh, endorphins are released that produce a pleasant, calming effect, and it is a wonderful physical release as well. Learning to lighten up and see the humor in situations and in others can go a long way toward reducing stress in our day. 

{my niece is super ticklish. Try to watch this and be stressed}

10. Seeing the Splendor
The following sums up the importance of taking each day for what it is, a splendid gift. We only get one chance to make the most of each day. We need to define what making the most of it really means. Here's one women's idea: 

Here's to a stress free weekend! Just an added note: As I was writing this, in the Starbucks at Stamford mall because we have no home, I watched a woman walk by pushing an empty stroller with a screaming toddler in her arms, and only wearing one shoe.  Stress happens, but these 10 steps really can help prevent it from ruining your day. 

Thanks for visiting!